Orgasm Denial Poll: More women use it; More men are interested

As of February 2, 2014, in the ongoing Femdom Lifestyle poll on orgasm denial, it seems that almost 60% of the women who responded have employed orgasm denial for their men while a bit more than 40% are interested in it. On the other hand, more men are interested in experiencing male chastity (54%) than have actually had the experience.
Women: maybe it’s time to take action?!
There is a good chance that if you are interested but haven’t broached the subject, maybe your man is too.

10 Femdom pictures for the New Year

Femdom Lifestyle wants to wish all its followers a very Happy New Year!

These 10 pictures represent the self-assured women of the Femdom Lifestyle who enjoy being in control of their men (and/or women). Each sits comfortably, as her (naked) devotee kneels at her feet.

Will it be a paddling, or will she allow her thrall to masturbate? Will it be a strap on dildo tonight? Only she knows what the future has in store tonight and next year…

Happy 2014!

Over 2,500 Views of the Femdom Lifestyle!

One Woman’s list of Femdom Principles

For a man like me, who craves to serve women and has been searching for guidance from a woman who enjoys the femdom lifestyle, it is pleasure to have arrived at this blog of an anonymous woman in a female-led marriage.

In her introduction, she so perfectly lists her Femdom principles, which seem so close to mine. She has inspired me to add pictures from my collection.

“My husband and I have been married for over 5 years. As we’ve gotten to know each other, our relationship has evolved and gone through several different phases. . Our relationship today is based on FemDom Principles:”

1. Submission to Female Authority


2. Obedience Training


3. Service to Mistress


4. Female Body Worship


5. Tease, Denial & Humiliation


6. Male Chastity & Orgasm Control


7. Corporal Discipline


8. Strap-On Training’


9. Feminization


10. CuckoldingCuckolding

Advice about the importance of pegging from a woman in a female led marriage:


Here is some advice from a woman in a Female-led marriage about training her man (the photos/clips are from my collection):

In a FemDom relationship… getting the strap-on is not an option.

Don’t let the challenges of the first few sessions deter you. He’ll resist and try to manipulate his way out of it. He’ll talk about how much it hurts and how uncomfortable if feels. He’ll scream like a little bitch the first few times. All of that’s very normal.

But just keep at it. Your goal is to make it a very normal part of his experience. Believe me, he’ll eventually get used to it.

After a while… 2-3 months of getting it pretty regularly… some pretty wonderful things will start to happen. His selfish, argumentative masculine edge will dissipate. He will become much more cooperative and attentive to your needs. His submissive side will come out and blossom. He will become much less concerned with his orgasms, and more focused on yours. His erogenous zone will slowly start to shift from the head of his penis to the opening to his asshole and his prostate gland.

More than 10,000 hits on Femdom Lifestyle

Femdom Lifestyle now has surpassed 10,000 hits in less than 3 months!

What a testament for all those women leaders, and the men and women who worship them! Thank you!

Favorites seem to be (in order):

CFNM- Clothed Females Nude Males

An Orgasm-Denial Manual for Women

From Boardroom to Bedroom

The Many Aspects of Sexual Female Domination

Sexual Humiliation:


Femdom male re-education

Femdom Corporal Punishment

CBT (Cock and Ball Torture)

Male Chastity

Male Chastity Devices:

Orgasm Denial

The woman of my dreams: Is this femdom or is it BDSM?
If you haven’t had the chance please participate in our reader poll.

Femdom From Boardroom to Bedroom

Female supremacy or female domination (A.K.A.  Femdom) is a lifestyle that can be divided into three areas: Social, Domestic and Sexual.

‘Social Femdom’ is what has sometimes been called ‘Matriarchy’. Currently there are no true matriarchal societies, but current Western societies are slowly accepting more women in leadership positions. This has not been easy, and strong women (like Hillary Clinton) are often considered ‘butch’ or ‘bitchy’.

Social Femdom also applies to leadership positions for women in the work force. The concept that a woman can be a man’s boss has been considered ‘unnatural’ in the past, but slowly is growing in many firms and work places. Although sex and sexuality officially (and legally) has no place in our social institutions, it is naive to believe that sexual tensions (or outright sex) do not exist in politics or the boardroom. This might be true whether the boss is a man and the sub is a woman or the boss is a woman and the sub a man, but in our society it is safe to say that the latter is regarded as a more ‘unnatural’ relationship- and one that often causes the male to feel a level of humiliation among his peers.

‘Domestic Femdom’ is where the woman is dominant in the non-sexual aspect of a personal relationship, or marriage. In fact, I suspect that many marriages evolve to this type of relationship over time- and is becoming more acceptable. In the past, men were called hen-pecked or milquetoasts if they allowed the woman to take the lead in the household and domestic life. This again is likely driven by sexual tensions, but is changing- maybe to a more ‘natural’ state of female domination…

Finally, ‘Sexual Femdom’ is the concept that sexual gratification is the right of women over men. This is a reversal from the traditional concept that a woman was meant to satisfy her man- usually in the role of a submissive and willing receptacle… In my experience, most women- even if they are domestic and social dominants- feel uncomfortable in a sexually dominant role. In this respect, the bedroom is the final frontier of Femdom- and I hope that this blog will help women feel more comfortable exploring  and considering how to adopt this into their lives (they may also discover that most men are already more than willing); and that it will help men feel reassured that their often repressed submissive desires toward women is natural.

For me, the picture above demonstrates the sexual nature of all forms of femdom- as a female boss is most likely instructing her male underling to kiss her shoes- a clear demonstration of submission and humiliation. And although there is no fetish clothing, no cane or whip, no strap-on dildo, the message is clear and the sexual tension is extremely strong.

It is this sexual tension that permeates through every aspect of femdom and the female led relationship. If you are interested in some of the many sexual aspects of femdom, follow this link.

The Many Aspects of Sexual Female Domination

Aspects of Femdom Femdom is all about putting the woman first; and the Femdom lifestyle now permeates every aspect of human relationships: from Social to Domestic to Sexual. Socially, women have gotten leadership positions over men in the workplace and government and domestically it is no secret that many marriages are female led. But it is the sexual aspect of femdom that in this society still seems most taboo.

How do you react to this photo? What do you think of the woman? What do you think of the men at her feet? Are you shocked (or maybe even disgusted) by the implications?
Although the picture implies a certain measure of BDSM, like the femdom lifestyle, it implies so much more. There is Goddess worship, humiliation, and devotion to woman… all aspects of the female dominant lifestyle.
Below is a list of some of the various aspects of sexual femdom and a brief description of each. Each item with a hyperlink will guide you to a more detailed photo/post on the subject (these will be added and updated as they become available). I am sure this is only a partial list of aspects of femdom- so please free to add or to comment on the ones below:
Goddess Worship:
This is the worship of a woman as a Goddess. It can be simply metaphorical or can truly be a religious experience (especially from the man’s point of view). The photo above comes close to representing this.
Orgasm Denial:
This is a form of ‘Discipline’ (the D in BDSM) where the woman denies her man permission to have an orgasm. This can be anywhere from a few minutes (during intense teasing and sexual stimulation), to days, weeks or months. This Discipline serves to establish the woman’s control over her man and often leads to extremely intense orgasms for her charge when she finally grants him permission.
Male Chastity:
This is an extreme form of orgasm denial that can be simply not allowing the man to have an orgasm (for a specific amount of time) to locking his penis in a cage sometimes called a ‘male chastity device’. Some devices simply prevent erections while other may have urethral ‘plugs’ or painful barbs.Male chastity can be used in many ways by the woman (this will be discussed later), but for the man it is a constant reminder that his manhood belongs to his woman.
In femdom, cuckolding is the subjugation of a woman’s sub-male to watching and/or knowing about her sexual encounters with other (usually well endowed) men- or women. For the sub-male this demonstrates to himself and to his woman his sexual inadequacy and is a form of sexual humiliation (see below). For the woman it is a form of both submission (to the well endowed man) and dominance… with a little mental sadism.
In femdom, pegging usually consists of the woman using a strap-on dildo in anal intercourse with her sub. For the woman, this is the ultimate in sexual control and power, and for the sub-male it is often the ultimate in sexual humiliation and submission.
Feminization / Cross-dressing:
This is the practice of having (often forcing) the man to dress and be made up like a woman. It is a form of sexual humiliation and sexual re-education (see below) that is most effective in men who have been misogynists or male chauvinists in their prior roles. It essentially forces the man to experience the sexual humiliation and degradation that he would have inflicted on the women in his life.
Sexual Humiliation:
This is a major aspect of femdom; and often one of the most erotic! It can span from feminization to pegging to cuckolding to corporal punishment and beyond…
It cuts deep into a man’s sexuality and masculinity, exposing him to a most intense intimacy with his woman. In many ways it is a process that eventually leads to the sexual re-education of the man. Even though many women might not realize it, men often find sexual humiliation an extremely erotic experience…
CBT (Cock and Ball Torture):
Although this is mainly a form of Sada-Masochism, it is often used in femdom. Often a woman might flick the man scrotum with her finger if she is unhappy with his erection… Sometimes she might use a small crop (sometimes called a penis whip) to ‘correct’ a man’s attitude, arousal or misbehavior.
Corporal Punishment:
Although often considered BDSM, this can be a very powerful tool in femdom to define the dominant female and the submissive male roles. There are many forms, including caning, paddling, whipping and spanking. In the picture above, each groveling male shows signs of having endured corporal punishment at the hand of their Goddess.
CFNM (Clothed Female Nude Male):
The use of nudity as a sign of subservience of the male and clothing as a sign of privilege in the woman is a very effective way to define the Femdom relationship. There is much symbolism in this practice, but the bottom line is that it defines the male as a sex object while the dressed woman is now the ogler- an instant role reversal….
Sex Role Reeducation:
This is a rather nebulous aspect of femdom that often depends on the woman, the man and their relationship. It is the concept that most men in current society have been raised in male dominated sexual roles while the woman has been encouraged to be submissive. Re-education (for both parties) can use any of the above aspects of femdom to establish and re-enforce the new roles of Woman over man. It can also employ all aspects of BDSM- but especially the Discipline portion. Since femdom is usually a continuing relationship (as Miss Coquette has so eloquently reminded me), I believe this may be one of its most important tools to keep the relationship clear and exciting.

Financial Domination: This is the practice that ranges from men giving ‘tributes’ to a woman to a long standing relationship where the man supports the woman in the ‘lifestyle fit for his Princess’.

Femdom male re-education


When it comes to understanding what women want and need, it is certain that most men have no clue. This is especially true in our current male-centric society where women are still regarded as submissive to men and are expected to serve their man’s needs. In addition, it is still considered a taboo in our society for a man to take a submissive role in a heterosexual relationship.

What is your reaction at the pictures above? Does it seem natural? Would it be different if the roles were reversed? Do the men seem any less masculine because they are ‘serving’ their woman’s needs or worshiping her?

It is safe to say that even for the man who might be interested in the femdom lifestyle, there is a lot to learn… or perhaps unlearn… before he can truly fit into the lifestyle. Not only must he learn the particular whims and pleasures of his woman/Mistress, he must also be broken of the well ingrained concepts that most men have had instilled in them.

He has to be trained to adopt as an instinct that he is there to serve his Mistress. He has to understand what it is to cede control (especially sexual control) to his woman, and at the same time find fulfillment in her sexual gratification- even when he is denied his own.

Femdom training can take many different directions, depending on the woman’s prerogative. It can be mostly domestic, making the man do the house chores or whatever else his woman commands; but ultimately it is a sexual re-education.

Some of the potential methods of femdom training may include (but are certainly not limited to) corporal punishment, sexual rewards, orgasm denial, pegging, sexual humiliation and even male chastity.

Many of these have been discussed in other posts, but two tools of femdom training are particularly useful in femdom reeducation: the establishment of a teacher (woman)/ schoolboy relationship and teaching the man to enjoy taking a sexually submissive role.

The establishment of a ‘re-education’ school (or clinic, or institute) is a good way to introduce role-playing into the relationship- and introduce the man to the his new Teacher. Even if the man is older and more sexually experienced than the woman, he is still ignorant of how to behave in his new role and this immediately puts his Mistress/teacher in command. The woman might want to lay down the rules for her new pupil and back it up with a list of rewards and punishments depending on his progress.

The punishment can vary depending on the woman’s preference. The more strict might include corporal punishment, while the more demure woman might choose orgasm denial. Rewards should mostly have a sexual aspect, but designed to make it clear that the woman is now in charge of his sexuality. Rewards might include being allowed to masturbate in front of his Mistress or be allowed to pleasure his Mistress (any way she chooses).

The rest of the re-education curriculum can be left up to the woman’s imagination.

Finally, another important component of a man’s sexual reeducation should include experiencing the pleasure of ceding sexual control to his woman. For some women this might simply be denying orgasm for long periods (or even locking his manhood in a male chastity device) and then allowing him an orgasm under her conditions. But probably the most effective way to have him experience loss of control is by being taken by the woman with a dildo- preferably with a strap-on dildo . (This is called pegging and is further discussed here).

Readers are encouraged to add their own suggestions and or comments.

Femdom Corporal Punishment

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Femdom Corporal Punishment

Corporal Punishment (CP) is defined by Wikipedia as a form of physical punishment that involves the deliberate infliction of pain as retribution for an offense, or for the purpose of disciplining or reforming a wrongdoer, or to deter attitudes or behavior deemed unacceptable. The term usually refers to methodically striking the offender with the open hand or with an implement, whether in judicial, domestic, or educational settings.

CP is similar in femdom, with the addition of a distinct sexual undercurrent and a healthy dose of humiliation.

In femdom, CP can be used as part of training the sub (male or female) to learn and accept his or her new role; disciplining him or her when caught doing something proscribed (like masturbation without permission), or even for entertainment (for the woman who have a little sadistic streak in her).

As Wikipedia explains there are several ‘implements’ used in femdom CP. There is plain old spanking with the bare hand, which often hurts the hand of the woman meting out the punishment. But for the woman who wants to spare her hand, there is a large range of implements of punishment that includes, rulers, wooden spoons, spatulas, paddles (ping pong or sorority paddles are some examples), canes (specially made for ‘caning’), riding crops, belts and even whips.

The methods of punishments can vary greatly as well, depending on the reason for the punishment and the woman’s whims. To be most effective, the sub should be naked (or at least with a bare ass), and made to get in a certain vulnerable and humiliating pose to receive his or her punishment. A ceremonial air helps the punishment achieve a certain authoritarian position for the woman carrying out the punishment, and increases the humiliation for the receiver.

Although there is a degree of BDSM in CP, it can often be a sensuous experience, or at least sexual. This is particularly true if sexual humiliation is added to the ceremony.

In some cases, the sub may actually experience ‘sub space’, a response that is similar in intensity to orgasm but is not necessarily sexual. This ‘sub space’ experience truly is a BDSM experience, but in a female led relationship can help solidify the woman’s domination over her sub. Having had this experience twice, I can say it is truly a mind blowing experience….